Gratitude is an attitude we cultivate with practice. It’s a tangible force. Think of it as a muscle we develop over time. The more you use it the stronger it gets.
It is one thing to be grateful for things that feel good and are already creating and generating happiness. It’s another thing to be grateful for the “hard stuff.” You know, those times where your heart’s been broken, you’ve lost your job, or things just aren’t going the way you want them to. In these moments it’s easy to reach for self-pity, doubt, victimization and blame — the world of DRAMA.
As I was leaving my house for an appointment today, my car didn’t start. At first I was frustrated at my husband for not being there to help me. Next, I was angry at the universe for making it hard. Finally, I took some deep breaths, called the person who I was meeting and told them I’d be late.
I got my bike and helmet from the garage and started down my driveway. I wasn’t one minute into it before I realized what a blessing this had become. Being on my bike was exactly what I needed! In that moment, I felt a wave of gratitude come over me. I was grateful for the beauty of the day, the fresh air on my face, the exercise I was getting and the time to slow things down and notice. This felt great, and it was much more spacious and liberating than the frustration and anger I was previously feeling.
Gratitude at this level is about being aware and taking personal responsibility for what’s going on and its impact on you. It’s easier to numb out in ego and drama rather than trusting in the lesson or the bigger picture. You cannot be in ego and feel gratitude at the same time. Gratitude helps us take our mind away from the fear or anger and redirect it toward trust and peace. Now really, where would you rather hang out?
I’m not saying don’t feel the pain of anger or sadness. Releasing clean emotions is important and healthy. But the key is to release them. Let them go and quickly reach for gratitude.
Gratitude is an expansive emotion. The more you feel it the more reasons you will find to feel it. It propels you forward in confidence, peace and trust. And, it feels good!
Take action now:
Below are a few ways to help you tap into gratitude.
- Every morning upon awakening or in the evening before falling asleep, remember five things you are grateful for. Actually saying them out loud turns up the gratitude volume. By hearing your voice say the words, you are taking them out of your head and really claiming them as yours.
- Keep a gratitude journal. Add to it when you are feeling particularly grateful. Pouring stories, photos, words and pictures into this journal is like pouring this higher frequency onto the pages. Then, when you are in a funk and need a little help accessing gratitude, you can open up the book and reconnect to this wonderful energy.
- When things aren’t going in the direction you desire, drop out of your head (where your ego lives) and into your body. Slow things down by taking a few deep breaths and get curious. Ask yourself: Where is the gift here? How could this be propelling me in a more positive direction? What would it be like to trust in this moment? Try to see the glass half-full instead of half-empty. What are your blessings instead of your problems?
- Get into the habit of tapping into gratitude throughout your day. Safely arriving at your destination, reconnecting with a loved one, or sitting down to a meal are all perfect times for this.
- Remember to be grateful for the simple things. Spend time in nature taking in the natural beauty around you. Listen to the sweet sounds of the birds, feel the wind on your skin, and smell the freshness in the air.
- Look in the mirror and thank your body for taking such good care of you.
- Tell someone you love just how grateful you are to have them in your life.
In fact, why don’t you do that last one RIGHT NOW!
For as long as I remember, I have been attracted to nature. I have been drawn to picnics, lazing in the park and cloud watching. Sleeping outside at our family’s lakeside cabin, I enjoy waking at dawn just as the stars are disappearing and the birds begin to sing. Turning in bed, I watch the colors change from deep blues to soft purples and pinks. I love to smell the fresh, cool air and feel the soft breeze on my face.
I believe we all have a connection to Mother Nature. Native people intuitively know this and have lived harmoniously with what they call Spirit.
Nature grounds and feeds us in a way technology cannot. It’s easy to get off course in the artificial chaos of concrete, traffic, artificial temperatures and lighting and begin to lose connection with our true selves. We can get caught in the frenzy of competition, comparing and keeping up, and then stop listening to the natural rhythm and evolution that nature provides.
We forget we are all connected to each other and to Mother Earth. We are just a small part of a collective consciousness or energy field.
Ecopsychology studies how our psychological health is connected to our relationship to the natural environment. Studies show that detaching ourselves from the natural environment is wounding our mental health. Science reveals that prolonged separation from nature can produce feelings of depression, anxiety and alienation. If we do not nurture this connection, it will affect our well-being.
Feng Shui for the Soul means connecting with the elements of earth, fire, water and wind.
You can do this outside by:
- Feeling the sun’s warmth on your skin
- Swimming in the sea, a mountain lake or river
- Going barefoot on the grass
- Feeling the wind in your hair
- Sitting in a garden
- Walking on a trail or along the beach
- Going camping or on picnics
- Watching a sunrise or sunset
You can do this inside by bringing the earth’s elements into your home.
- Ground yourself with the earth’s elements by bringing in stones, crystals, and terra cotta tiles or pots.
- Let in natural sunlight, an essential source for all of us. In the winter, skylights or windows, especially high ones, connect you with the sun’s natural rhythm.
- Bring in the water element with fountains, seashells and sand.
- Open your windows to allow air to circulate through, moving and freshening the energy of your home.
- Enjoy potted plants and cut flowers.
- Display photos, art or any objects representing nature.
- Use earth tones such as browns, yellows and golds, reds and oranges, blues and greens.
- Listen to recordings of water, birds or other natural sounds.
Of course, your desire and imagination have amazing impact as well. Close your eyes right now and take a meditative moment by imagining the natural elements surrounding you. Feel them, see them, smell them and hear them. This will connect you to Mother Earth in a very powerful way.
Take Action Now!
What are some ways you connect with Mother Nature?
- Take inventory inside and out and see if you can incorporate more of the earth’s elements into your life today. Feel the difference.
- Consciously choose to take a walk, sit by water or in a garden. Just getting out of your office in the fresh air for 10 big breaths can actually make you more productive.
As always, I’d love to hear your thoughts about this article and anything else on your mind. Please share your comments below.
©2010 Cindy Prosor, CPCC
Would you like access to one of the most powerful tools I use in my coaching and in my life? What is it, you may ask?
Intuition.
Intuition brings clarity, fluidity, answers and information, and a magical knowing that is often connected with miracles. Although most of us forget how to use it, intuition is something we are all born with.
Here are some of the benefits of using our intuition:
It helps you to slow down, be present and pay attention to the details of your life.
It allows you to be present in your body and understand what it has to tell you.
It helps you along your spiritual path.
You will experience more synchronicity and good luck.
You begin to have more confidence in your decision-making and life.
You take more authority in your life and begin to manifest like never before.
You gain clarity to why certain things occur and people show up.
You begin to find and follow your life’s path.
You begin to trust in the process of life, and life becomes easier.
It’s fun.
Miracles will begin to happen!
Below are 14 tips for using your intuition:
- Penny Peirce states, “Intuitive insights most commonly show up via three modes: vision, voice and vibration.” Notice your dreams and fantasies, listen to your “little voice” within, and notice what and where you feel it in your body.
- I’m often asked, how can you tell between the limiting beliefs of your ego’s lies and your intuition? Your ego lives in your head. Its voice consists of limiting beliefs, worries and stress. Your ego’s lies are fear-based. Watch for the story in your head. It usually consists of what-ifs, self-pity, victim, and blame. There is no story or drama attached to the wisdom of your intuition. It just is.
- Spend time daily connecting to that quiet place within. You must know yourself here to access intuition.
- Ask for what you want, and pay attention to what shows up. I often do this before meditation or a walk alone in nature. You must create the time and space to get clear with what you desire and notice what shows up.
- Keep a notebook handy. Write down a specific question you would like more clarity around. When things do appear (and they will), make a note of them. Review this at the end of the day, week and month. This is fun to look back on over the years to see how it’s all unfolded over time.
- It’s important to be optimistic when using your intuition. For example, an optimist will know she didn’t get the job for a reason…there’s a better opportunity coming later. The pessimist will use the experience to validate that nothing ever goes “right.”
- You must slow down and listen. Intuition cannot be heard when you are constantly moving from one thing to another. Insert some pauses throughout your day, and check into your intuition.
- Watch for multiples, especially threes. When you get a similar message from 2 or more sources, it is often a sign to move in that direction. Trust it and take a chance.
- Practice is important. It’s like a muscle. The more you use it, the stronger it gets. Guess who might be calling before you pick up the phone. See the parking place before you arrive at your destination.
- Trust it. This gets easier with time, but the more you trust your intuition, the more you will know your intuition.
- When things get difficult, let them go. Struggle is a sign you are going in the wrong direction. Always take the path of least resistance. Go with the flow.
- Release pent up energy and emotions by movement such as dancing or sports, crying or sound. Then be present and listen to what your body is trying to tell you.
- Notice your dreams. There is much wisdom here. Ask your question before going to sleep. Keep a dream journal by your bed and jot down specific memories upon awakening.
- Engage your other senses. Become aware and notice unique and outstanding sounds, tastes, textures, smells and sights. What do you notice? Does something “smell fishy”? What is the music in the background singing to you? Pay attention to the subtle things happening around you. Be present and notice what’s there.
Using your intuition raises your “Inner Feng Shui” or Well-Being. The more you practice using your intuition, the more you trust it. The more you trust it, the more optimistic and positive you become. As this occurs, your life begins to flow. It becomes easier and less stressful. With ease and flow, you feel creative, resourceful, productive and happy. And you know what happens from this place.
©2010 Cindy Prosor
Have you ever noticed how some people seem to have a charmed life?
Maybe it’s lasting love, plenty of money or a successful business. Maybe they are just happy for no reason at all.
Yet no matter how hard you try, when it comes to certain things in your life, you seem to hit a wall.
Why is it difficult for most of us to find fulfillment in certain areas in our life?
Each of us has a core pattern of fear or a belief that’s held in place from something that occurred in the past, usually when we were young.
As we begin to desire something, our fear can grip us in an unconscious belief that keeps us from exactly what we want. These old, subconscious beliefs and fears are keeping us from where we want to be today.
Here is an example. Let’s say, since you can remember, your family’s belief around money has been — it never comes easy and there’s never enough. Perhaps you grew up in an environment that believed those who have money are greedy and/or money corrupts people and societies.
Looking back over your life you notice money hasn’t come easy and if you’re really honest, you don’t expect it to change.
Yet, there are people in your life who seem to have all the money they desire and then some.
So, what’s the difference?
What you believe or feel on the inside (whether you are aware of it or not) is what you will create on the outside. Your life as you see it today is a reflection of your thoughts, beliefs, emotions and fears.
These fears and beliefs don’t have to be around money. They can include fears of abandonment, humiliation, co-dependency, perfection, and failure just to name a few.
When you lovingly become aware of your old constricting fears and beliefs, you are able to see them differently. From this place you can dismantle them and create new beliefs so you can begin living the life you desire and deserve.
Take Action Now:
- Look at where you struggle in your life. It could be healthy relationships, money, a fulfilling career, a loving partner or just believing in your self.
- Notice the fear pattern or belief that is keeping you stuck? Do you believe you must be perfect? That life is hard? Are you dependent on others or afraid you’ll be abandoned or betrayed? Do you believe men/women are not to be trusted?
- Become intimate with this belief and/or fear. Have compassion for this frightened or confused part of yourself.
- Now allow the adult within to redefine what is really true for you. Step powerfully into this new belief.
To claim freedom and happiness in your life, you must become intimate with your fears and beliefs so you can dismantle them and create the life you desire.
©2010 Cindy Prosor
My client Debbie couldn’t understand why she didn’t feel happy. Although she had what looked like the perfect life from the outside, she was hurting and confused on the inside.
Debbie went to college and got a degree for her parents. Next, she married her high school sweetheart and tried hard to be a good wife. She worked hard all her life, trying to please others and do the “right” things, yet most of the time she was left feeling hollow and empty. Debbie also spent much of her life comparing herself to others. She wasn’t being authentic to her True Self.
What is it to be authentic?
To me, it begins with knowing, trusting and respecting myself. It’s about making the choice to be and to live from my heart, not from my head. It’s about doing what’s right for me, first. Without apologies.
What keeps you from showing up authentically? Read the rest of this entry »
